I was so upset when my little Claire peed on the floor instead of in the toilet, but what else can I do? I couldn’t do anything for the things just happened but to clean it. For several times, I advised her to tell me if she wants to pee but still, everything doesn’t always work according to my plan. Or probably there were times when Claire spilt the milk on the floor because she was too focus on the DVD lesson I gave her while drinking milk.

So here I come with an idea, instead of being angry, I gave her a brainy punishment and teaching chores at the same time. Every time she peed on the floor or spilt the milk, I gave her tissue to wipe the floor. After finished wiping it, I asked her to throw away the wet tissue in the garbage box. If she peed on the floor, I also asked her to wash her own underwear. The main thing is not the result since she was only 2 years old, but what can she learn from it?

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Recently I saw many children became “handicapped”. Well, to make it simple, I’m going to give an example.

1. When children were facing a difficulties, instead of trying, they will ask their mom or dad to do it for them, saying, “I can’t do it. It’s too difficult for me….”

2. When they tried it and fail, they will cry and give up.

3. Before they face difficulties, there are many parents or maidservant who became a helper for them so that children never face difficulties at all, saying that they couldn’t help to see their children facing a difficulties.

If these conditions keep on going, children will lack confident because they never face difficulties at all. So what are you going to do to prevent these condition? Are you going to let it flow? I think it is better to change the condition!

1. Let your child know that at some point, they too can do it themselves. Give them a motivation that they can do it.

2. If your children tried and couldn’t do it, help them until they can continue it themselves.

3. Ask your maidservant to let go and help them only when they really really needed it. Otherwise, let them try it themselves.

If you do it, I believe that your children will find out that they can do it themselves and next time they would like to try it themselves. In that way, they will be more confident in everything they do…

Do you know that most of our children are smart and intelligent by birth! Probably some of you will not believe it, but if the process went in a normal way, our children are smart. But again, some of you will continue saying that you children are not that smart compared with other children.

Is that their fault? No! It’s our fault as parents, since God gave us the same brain, but all we have to do is to give good nutrition so that the free brain we got can develop in a good way. Other important thing is STIMULATION. Without stimulation, they did not get an opportunity to develop their brain functions in a normal manner.

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I was so shocked to hear the news. At that time, I was about to go to South Jakarta and my Japanese friend said, “There was a bomb in a hotel in Jakarta!” I said, “What? I didn’t know about that. How did you know that?” ”There was a news on my phone.” 

Suddenly my phone ringing. It was my mom calling, she asked me to be more careful on the road because of the bomb.

When I got back home, I saw a terrible news about a man who was about to have his third baby coming on that day. His wife asked him not to go to work and accompany her to the hospital, but that man decided to go to work and unfortunately, he was on the wrong place in the wrong time…. That was the end of his day forever. He couldn’t see his third baby coming, he couldn’t accompany his wife and children growing up,…. (That’s why you have to listen to your wife at some point!)

Well,… I know it’s difficult to raise 2 children and a baby as a single parent. How to introduce dad’s figure without him alive? Should we lie to our children that their dad went somewhere and will be back soon? Should we cover the real story and make a new story about their dad?

It will be very difficult to make them understand at the first time, but I think it is better to tell them the fact that their dad is gone and you guys will meet again one day. Explain to them and make them understand, do not lie about this. If you start with a lie, you will keep on doing it over and over again and it will hurt more at the end when children find out that their dad is gone.

After that, you can show some pictures or video about dad, probably on his birthday. You can ask your children to pray together for daddy, draw some picture and hang it on the wall. In this way, you can make children appreciate their dad even though their dad is not around anymore. I think that is the best way… What do you think?

Toilet training is really important for our baby, but we found out that toilet training is really difficult to do. Not because our baby didn’t want to, but because we’re tired to clean up after they peed on the floor or on the bed (mostly on the bed, since it will leave a sign, it will make our bed wet and sometimes smells bad! We have to change the bed sheet as well)

“Oh my…. I just clean up the floor, why you didn’t tell me if you want to pee?”

Moreover, we have to change the pants over and over again, leaving a bunch of dirty clothes and dirty bed sheet at the end of the day. Trust me, I’m so tired to do the laundry when I started toilet training since Claire can pee 4-5 times on the floor or on the bed, or everywhere. I decided to use diapers again for several months.

Then I read something on the news that sometimes, diapers contain a dangerous material that will cause a disease for baby’s vital area. I have no idea wether it’s true or not, since I got different opinion from different doctor. I decided not to use diapers anymore and use it only for sleeping time.

Then I found something that made Claire want to tell me if she wants to pee. I asked her to wipe the floor if she peed on the floor without telling me. After several times of doing it, Claire can make it! She told me in advance! Quite working, don’t you think so? I know that it seems ro mean, but I gave her the explanation that she has to tell me if she wants to pee. If she didn’t tell me, that what will happen. So she understand and accept it ( she cried sometimes… )

So in the morning till afternoon, it’s not a big problem, but when sleeping, I tried several times not using diaper, but Claire always pee on the bed.

The solution: take her around 12 am to the toilet, she peed and I save the day! Up to now, she never peed on the bed while sleeping. She can manage to pee in the morning!

So, take courage. I know it’s tiring, but it will be a great advanture with your little one!

Some parents raised their hands when they where asked, “Who said that drawing is not important for children?” Well, what is your answer? Did you plan to raise your hand as well?

Probably some of you will think the same and force our children to learn math and science instead of drawing or playing  music, but the truth is drawing and playing music is really important for children’s right brain stimulation.

To be clever, children MUST have a balance brain, not only left brain, but also right brain. Left brain fungtioned  to control the scientific, analitical, rational and logical thing such as reading, language, math, etc, while right brain fungtioned to control about everything related to art, flexibilty and creativity. If we stimulate left brain more than right brain, children will be less creative in problem solving thing, but if we stimulate right brain more than left brain, it will be difficult to put dicipline on them and they will be more flexible in everything. That’s why we have to stimulate both brain.

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Probably most of us know about Peter Pan story, a young man who stays young and live in Neverland. My little baby loves to see Tinker Bell the Fairy in that story and I think most of children will choose to live in a place like Neverland, a place where they can play and find happiness as a child.

When I heard about Neverland for the first time when Michael Jackson bought that ranch, I didn’t really know what it was. I thought  that it was a name for the ranch but I realized it when I read the story of Peter Pan 2 years ago for my baby. That’s my ‘AHA’ moment.

Then, when Michael Jackson died, I heard so many story about how Michael loved to play just like a child, how he wanted to stay young like Peter Pan, and how he built the place to fulfill his dream as a child.

Well, it’s really sad to remember about Michael’s life, that even though he had everything in life, successful career, money, power, children, but there was something missing in his life,… his childhood. He didn’t have enough time to play with other children when he was little, he felt lonely because he had no friend to play with. 

Back to my life here, sometimes I was so mean to my little girl. She always ask me wheter she can play with her friend or not, but at the first time, my answers were “NO” because I thought playing with me is enough for her. Then I realized how happy she was when she played with her friend, playing soccer, ballon, bicycle, or just hanging around doing nothing.

Now, thinking about Michael’s story, I always remember that no matter what life we wanted our child to be, I will always give time for my baby to play with her friends. I don’t want her to end up in sorrow, thinking about her missing childhood. So parents, what do you think about this?

Parents usually want to have a brilliant children but the question is how? To increase children’s intelligences, there are 3 things that are important to remember:

1. Genetics: we could not do anything with it… we can call it a blessing

2. Environment: including

• Nutrition: exclusive breast milk for 6 months and other nutritious food after 6 months of breast milk. The formation of organs and body will not wait for the food, so if the baby is not eating properly, the brain development also will slow down, so giving proper and nutritious food for your baby is a must.
• Stimulation: there are many parents said to me that it is useless to read, to play, to teach baby since they couldn’t understand. For your information, baby’s brain is like a sponge, it’s ready to absorb much information from us, parents. When we give them information, it looks like they don’t understand, but actually, they save the information in their brain and they will use it later when whey grown up.
• Psychological: baby’s brain can develop in a better way if they live in a loving family, where they can be loved, can be hugged, can be kissed without any conditions.

3. Balance brain, left and right brain can work in a balance way.

 With that in mind, I think we can increase our baby’s multiple intelligences.

Baby’s brain is like a sponge, it will absorb everything, every information you gave them and here is the proof of it.

Claire can finish 80 pieces of puzzle within 9 minutes 53 secs!

At first I couldn’t believe that she can do the puzzle but we practice almost every day and within 5 days, she can do it for the first time for 15 minutes. And from that time on, she showed a great improvement with her record is 9 minutes 23 secs. So this is a great example that if you stimulate your baby, she will absorb every thing and she will store the data in her brain, use it again when she needs it.

Step by step to introduce puzzle to baby:

1. Introduce her with 2-3 pieces of puzzle for the first time.
2. Show her how to put the puzzle in the right place so that her brain will make connection. By the time you repeat, she will understand how to put the puzzle in the right place.
3. Learn about color is a great step to do.
4. After she can differentiate color, ask her which part has the same with the color she holds at that time. When she learn about color, she can have a great improvement for doing the puzzle.
5. After that you can use the 6 pieces, then increase the number to 9 pieces, 12 pieces, and so on.
6. After several times of doing it, I believe your baby will be much brainy than ever!

Give a try and tell me how it works for you!

To see Claire doing it, click here.

One man came to me after my seminar, asked me about his 2.5 years old boy who doesn’t like to eat fruit nor vegetable. He said he tried to make juice from the fruit but still the little boy unwilling to drink it. As soon as he tasted the juice, he spilled it out and refused to drink. So, what should he do to give balance nutrition?

This is really interesting and many parents didn’t really know about this. According to Joan Beck, a writer of the best seller book in US, all babies have a “sensitive period” in the first year of her life. After drinking breast milk exclusively for 6 months, baby is ready to learn to eat. So this is the perfect period to teach baby the taste of various foods. When baby tastes the food, she will memorize the taste and save it in her brain. Soon, when she grown up, she will recognize the taste of foods she tried in the sensitive period and will eat it happily. Thank God I knew this information before!

If parents never give fruits and vegetables during this period, baby will not have any memory about this. So, no wonder if she becomes a picky eater when she grown up.

So, that’s the first thing. And second, as parents, we should give a good example. If we want our children to eat fruit and vegetables, while we never eat one of them, don’t yell at your children if they follow your example. They will say to themselves, “Well, my mom and dad never eat that either, so why should I?” Learn to be a good example for your child is another thing to do.

If those two didn’t work, try to be creative with the food!
Try to make creation with the carrot. Make a flower, butterfly, bug, or anything you can make. You can find a cute cutter in the cooking store department.

1. Instead of using chicken, try use cauliflower or broccoli, dip it into egg, pour out bread crumb and try to make cauliflower nugget or broccoli nugget. They will surprise with the taste!
2. Make juice with fruits. Make a popsicle with it. They’ll love to eat popsicle with natural juice!
3. Cut watermelon or melon with a star shape cutter or flower shape cutter and put some ice on the top of it. Who knows they would like to try it.

I hope my idea could help you dealing with the food!